Some people will say "be thankful for what you've gotten", and we are. But there is that part of me that is fearful of Daniel's happiness when he realizes that he is different from other people, and that the people out there are mean, mean people sometimes. That they are not as accepting as his family and friends. That they might stare and treat him different then others. Little do they know, if he were given enough time to show you, you would see that he is a very mature and intelligent little boy. And what is sad, is that people are in such a rush that they don't' give him enough time. Daniel has a diagnosis that makes it hard for him to quickly respond. But you know that what you ask of him is being processed, you just need patience. You might say "hi" to him, give him 30 seconds or so, and he'll respond with his "hi" but he is smiling while he is trying to process how to get his mouth to move the way it needs to. Some people will say "it could be worse", and you're right it could be.
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
I Hate FREAKING SEIZURES!!
Some people will say "be thankful for what you've gotten", and we are. But there is that part of me that is fearful of Daniel's happiness when he realizes that he is different from other people, and that the people out there are mean, mean people sometimes. That they are not as accepting as his family and friends. That they might stare and treat him different then others. Little do they know, if he were given enough time to show you, you would see that he is a very mature and intelligent little boy. And what is sad, is that people are in such a rush that they don't' give him enough time. Daniel has a diagnosis that makes it hard for him to quickly respond. But you know that what you ask of him is being processed, you just need patience. You might say "hi" to him, give him 30 seconds or so, and he'll respond with his "hi" but he is smiling while he is trying to process how to get his mouth to move the way it needs to. Some people will say "it could be worse", and you're right it could be.
Monday, July 30, 2007
Counting Down.....
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Update Medley
Daniel also got his new DAFO's, which are might spiffy if I might say so myself. These are his second pair, and these ones have hinges. Today was the first day of Daniel wearing them. He wears them for 1 hour only, and each day we go up by one hour. During that one hour, Daniel decided to walk down the sidewalk and to the corner of our street in his Pony. This is a fairly long distance for him, but he did really well. And of course he had quite a few cheering bystanders!! WAY TO GO DANIEL!! Below is a photo of Daniel attempting to use a walker for the first time that does not have the trunk support or the seat. He found out quickly that this piece of equipment didn't' have any place for him to rest! (No worries......No Daniels were harmed during this therapy session!)
Monday, July 23, 2007
Frank A. Gatto: July 4, 1972 - July 16, 2007
On the 16th of July 2007, a good friend of mine passed away. He had battled diabetes his entire life. It kicked his butt pretty good, but he never let anyone know it.
There are few words that can express the loss of a family member or close friend. My brother, Marty, was especially close to Frank. As close as any two people could ever be. I am copying a letter he wrote about Frank and read at his funeral. A lot of it won't mean anything to a person that didn't know him, but it meant the world to me and the dozens of other friends and family that heard it. I wanted to post it here as a farewell message.
I am uncertain about exactly when the friendship between Frank and I first began. It seems like it was just forever. Our friendship was a constant; it always was and always will be. Our mothers brought us together. They met at our grade school. So, I guess you can say that our friendship spawned from the friendship of our mothers. Rose and Dreena are a couple of sweet, kind, caring and loving women. They took an unwritten oath when they gave birth to their children. They said that they would take care of them, not just until they were old enough to be on their own, but until time no longer permitted them to do so. Frank and I had no say in this. Our mothers worried about us every day of our lives, every day we walked out that door. For me, my mother worried because I was a nut case. Frank, his mother’s worries were doubled. Rose worried about Frank’s battle with the unfortunate disease he was dealt at a very young age. I’m sure she also worried that he was hanging out with a nut case. In all seriousness, I am certain she knew he was in good company. Our families were much alike. We are what you call good people. It was that awful disease, diabetes, which kept her awake till Frank walked back in the door at night.
Somewhere around high school we became inseparable. It was Spezia that reunited us. From there on; Frank was my right hand man, and I was his. Soon thereafter he was dubbed “Nitty” by the crew. A name of respect, we called him Frank Nitty. He was very close with many members of the crew as well. You need look no further than his pall bearers to find the individuals that shared many of the same memories that I have with him. I’d sit on my couch at home on Stephens and wait till I heard the thump of Nitty’s kicker in his black Lebaron as he left from home on Pingree. The first moment I could faintly hear the sound of the bass was my cue to walk out to the curb. The timing was perfect. I would ride shot-gun and we went on our way. The destination was never in question. The Sheikh’s house was the place to be. This is where everyone was. This is where Frank was Frank. He was cunning, he was sarcastic, he was funny, and most importantly, he was completely happy. These were the best years of my life, and please let me tell you, they were most certainly the best years of Franks as well.
I wouldn’t know where to start if asked to tell some good stories from that time. I have a million of them. Suffice to say that we never had an uneventful day. I believe that people live on through the experiences they shared with others. I assure you that Frank will shine bright within me as long as I live. Every time someone shares a memory of Frank that they have with another, his existence will persist. I am very fortunate to have shared the amount of time that I did with him. With all the memories that I have, I can assure you that Frank’s soul will remain immortal. His soul will remain immortal until the day I face my own mortality.
Frank was a very loyal, kind and caring person. He was what I call a genuine human being. I spent most of my life with this man, and never once did we have a falling out. Frank was an old-school Italian at heart. He didn’t like to be double-crossed. We never had to worry about that though. We had more than a friendship as we grew older together. We became brothers. He was part of my family. I loved this man. I spoke those very words to him on the phone just a couple weeks back. I loved him as much as I could love another man that didn’t have the same blood as mine pumping through his heart.
I will miss you terribly my friend. My life has been changed forever. Thank you for being the best friend I ever had Nitty. Thank you for being my brother. It makes my heart feel good knowing that the majority of our lives were spent with each other. I told you many times that you would be the best man in my wedding someday. This has not changed. No one stands next to me that day my friend. That spot remains reserved for MY BEST MAN!!!
Immense Love,
Marty
Saturday, July 21, 2007
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Smiles!
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Augmentative Evaluation
The therapist said he is doing wonderfully with the eye gazing and PECS that we have been doing with him. We decided to try some of this stuff at home on our own and it seems to have worked to our benefit. She was impressed, which is always nice. He was able to acknowledge pictures that she wanted him to look at. For example, she would blow bubbles and then ask him to look at a few pictures (one containing bubbles, of course). He would look at the picture of bubbles and then look at her. We were very proud of Daniel, he did awesome. Then she also had him selecting things by pressing buttons that would say phrases. She had two buttons with two pictures, one for "I want to play with bubbles" and the second with "I want to play music" (both are winners with Daniel, so no matter what he picked he would have been happy). But he selected and figured out that what he looked at last was what he was going to get.
Then last but not least, Daniel got to use the computer, which I might add, really impressed Dad! She wheeled him up to an adjustable table and put the computer monitor within arms reach. It was a touch screen monitor, so when Daniel would touch the screen it would play music for a few seconds, then turn off. He learned quickly that to get the music (he LOVES music) to play he had to reach up and touch the screen again. That's my smart little boy!
So, that was Part 1 of his evaluation. She said she wanted to see how well he would do with joysticks and figuring those out. I already know he'll do wonderful because he figured out how to use it very quickly with the powered wheelchair!!
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Graduation Party
The Party was for Brandon and Brittany who graduated this year.
Pictured: Brandon - off to Ohio
Kelly who goes to Central, Blair - off to Italy in August to study(WOW! scary)
Brittany - off to Central to STUDY with Kelly.
Saturday, July 14, 2007
The Most Beautiful Flower
The park bench was deserted as I sat down to read
Beneath the long, straggly branches of an old willow tree.
Disillusioned by life with good reason to frown,
For the world was intent on dragging me down.
And if that weren't enough to ruin my day,
A young boy out of breath approached me, all tired from play.
He stood right before me with his head tilted down
And said with great excitement, "Look what I found!"
In his hand was a flower, and what a pitiful sight,
With its petals all worn - not enough rain, or too little light.
Wanting him to take his dead flower and go off to play,
I faked a small smile and then shifted away.
But instead of retreating he sat next to my side
And placed the flower to his nose
And declared with overacted surprise,
"It sure smells pretty and it's beautiful, too.
That's why I picked it; here, it's for you."
The weed before me was dying or dead.
Not vibrant of colors: orange, yellow or red.
But I knew I must take it, or he might never leave.
So I reached for the flower, and replied, "Just what I need."
But instead of him placing the flower in my hand,
He held it mid-air without reason or plan.
It was then that I noticed for the very first time
That weed-toting boy could not see: he was blind.
I heard my voice quiver; tears shone in the sun
As I thanked him for picking the very best one.
You're welcome," he smiled, and then ran off to play,
Unaware of the impact he'd had on my day.
I sat there and wondered how he managed to see
A self-pitying woman beneath an old willow tree.
How did he know of my self-indulged plight?
Perhaps from his heart, he'd been blessed with true sight.
Through the eyes of a blind child, at last I could see
The problem was not with the world; the problem was me.
And for all of those times I myself had been blind,
I vowed to see the beauty in life,
And appreciate every second that's mine.
And then I held that wilted flower up to my nose
And breathed in the fragrance of a beautiful rose
And smiled as I watched that young boy,
Another weed in his hand,
About to change the life of an unsuspecting old man
_________________________
What is wrong with people? I read this article from the UK and it sickens me.
I sat and cried when I read it this afternoon. This poor little baby. I know that perhaps there are some people who feel that the father was trying to help end the baby's suffering. I'm sorry, I feel nothing but hatred towards the father. Yes, I know hate is a very strong word. That little boy, bless his soul, did not ask for anything that was dealt to him in his life. That poor baby, that is all I can say.
I am sorry that you had to suffer in your short little life, and I am sorry that your father did this to you. And I am so sorry that there wasn't someone there to help you, and love you like you should have been loved. It is not fair, and it is not right what your father did to you.
Smells?
and out the door she is gone. Leaving me, the non-smeller of the house to figure out what the heck smells, and get it fixed BEFORE a graduation party!
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Boogerectomy
We also went to the doctor because ever since Daniel was a wee little lad, he gets boogery eyes in the morning, and ALWAYS has these huge boogers in his nose (more than I have ever seen in any of my other children). We actually have to go in and remove them.....this procedure is called in our family a "boogerectomy", so that he can breathe. I have always wondered if the eyes and the nose issue are connected and perhaps that they didn't develop correctly somehow. Anyways the ped. said that Daniel will probably need to have his tear ducts probed. Excuse me? he has to have what probed? OUCH. Does that not sound like the most painful thing? So of course I ask how this is done, where it is done, and who does it, does it hurt?. I didn't like the answers to any of the questions I asked!
First, they numb the eye area........no sedation (OK that means Daniel can move and squirm.....with someone who has a probe by his eyeball?) Second, its done in the office (YIKES!), Third, the eye doctor does it (OK not Daniel's eye doctor. He's OK to examine his eyes every 6 months but he is old and he is semi shaky and I can't imagine him with a probe at Daniel's eyeball!) and does it hurt.............HELL yea!
I Think NOT! I've got to work up to this procedure....until then, we'll have boogery eyes in the morning.
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Daniel the Explorer
Yesterday he was in it for about an hour and he wasn't real sure what to do but he liked being in it. We hooked a jump rope to the base and gentle pulled him to give him the idea that he needed to step to get it to move.
Today, he was in it off and on all day for about 5 hours! And he figured out how to move it himself, maybe not running but definitely figuring out how to maneuver it around. This child never ceases to AMAZE me. Then out of nowhere Daniel becomes an octopus....arms and hands ALL OVER THE PLACE... he discovered that "HEY.......I can reach the top of the telephone stand.......HEY, my favorite thing, the telephone, lets grab that!...........HEY is that FOOD? Did you leave the pantry doors open??? Let me get that for you!! HEY, who is that cute little boy (his reflection) in the dishwasher??" Hours and hours of Daniel walking around pulling things off the refrigerator, off the table tops, changing the channel on the TV, and adjusting the volume!
Stay tuned for more to come of "Daniel and his Pony"
Friday, July 6, 2007
Chillin'
Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there I do not sleep.
I am in a thousand winds that blow
I am the softly falling snow.
I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.
I am in the morning hush,
I am in the graceful rush
Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
I am the starshine of the night.
I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.
I am the birds that sing
I am in each gentle thing.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there. I did not die.
Thursday, July 5, 2007
4th of July
Who now is all riled up and won't go back to bed???
Well let me tell you.......I DISLIKE THEM VERY MUCH!
Happy 4th of July!
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Medication Update & The Pony
Last night instead of the 750 mg of Vigabatrin, we were instructed to start the wean and go to only 500 mg of Vigabatrin and the 50 mg of Zonegran. Granted, I wanted Daniel back to his happy self, but I don't want the seizures. So, we watched very carefully this morning (his normal time for seizures) and there were none......(counting our blessings..1, 2, 3, 4, 5....). And, like I said before, maybe its just me, but I thought today he seemed to be a little more of his old self. So, we'll hold our breath and see how tomorrow goes.
Is it possible to have a smart-aleck so young? Can an almost two year old be a smarty-pants? Sometimes I wonder with Daniel. He just has that look about him........and it frightens me. LOL
I think he shall be taking after his father!
So, we have seen little Eden from the twins "Holland & Eden" using a Snug Seat Pony gait trainer. It seems like it is very lightweight, and I don't think Daniel is strong enough yet to consistently move the gait trainer we have (Rifton Pace). So, I began a search to see where and how much these things will cost. I know our insurance will not pay for another gait trainer as we have the Rifton already. So, after a few days of digging, I found a Yahoo Group called Special Child Exchange (no, we are not swapping kids!). This is a place for parents that have special needs children to buy, sell or trade equipment they are not using anymore. And lo and behold, I found a woman from Richmond Virginia who happens to be traveling to Traverse City in the next couple of weeks and she has a Pony gait trainer! She is selling us the one she has that has only been used a few times and for about an eighth of what it costs new! And she is going to deliver it too!! I can't wait! I hope it will work for Daniel. She also has a few other pieces of equipment that I've been looking at for a while. Pretty soon you'll be able to call our house the Medical Equipment Warehouse!
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Preliminary Report
While doing the Video EEG Daniel didn't have (of course) any of the movements that we guess to be seizures. There were some movements that I wasn't really ever sure about so we mashed the button on 6 different occasions. NONE OF THOSE WERE SEIZURE ACTIVITY! Yeah for that.
Unfortunately, according to just the preliminary report, there are frequent spikes and waves in his left frontal and temporal lobe and a little from the right. So basically bilaterally. Which we knew from previous EEG's. Although they didn't' see an actual seizure, there is still the activity.
UGH.
Kathy (the nurse) is going to talk to Dr. C about adjusting some medicines because since all the changing of meds Daniel seems to not be himself. He isn't focusing on activities as much, doesn't have the get up and go like he did before. So she thinks that maybe we are too high on the Vigabatrin and we need to cut back so she will consult with the doctor.
Daniel is currently taking for his medicines the following concoction:
Morning: Vigabatrin 500 mg
Robinul 1 mg
Midmorn: 1 tsp Omega 3-6-9
Noon: Robinal 1 mg
Bedtime: Vigabatrin 750 mg
Zonegran 50 mg
My biggest fear, a side from the seizures, is that we have Daniel but we lose him and his personality to all of the meds that he will be taking. Its not fair to have someone, and have them taken away because of the different meds.