Welcome to "my world".
Until recently I hadn't realized how much I have retreated to "my world",and how much I have come to resent the 'outside world'
A blogger friend of mine, Ellen from To The Max recently posted about the same thing.
She gets it. Other parents of children with special needs get it.
People who don't have special needs children do not understand. They just can't relate.
Sometimes, its even the people who are close that sometimes just can't relate.
My safe world equates to our house, therapy, and his preschool classroom. These places, I don't mind being at. Take us out of these areas and I am uncomfortable. I am ready for a fight. Sometimes I'm just looking for someone to stare, instead of going about my own business and enjoying my child and our time.
At home, there is no one there to judge Daniel because he can't sit up on his own, or he has a special seat to sit in. Or he screams in excitement, or talks in his jabber-walkie talk that we understand 99% of.
At home, only people who understand us are here. Not people who will look at him weird or ask "what is he doing?". And if there are people here like that...I am uncomfortable and I want to flee to an area that they aren't.
I don't like answering the questions, or getting the looks of pity, or the questioning looks, trying to figure out what is going on. Just go with the flow..
he's not going to bite you, there is nothing to feel uncomfortable about. He is a little boy, with an amazing smile.
Sometimes I don't mind being the recluse. Then there are other times when I get pissed off because I feel we cant experience the things that everyone else gets to. Why can't we go about our lives without the ogling eyes of the outsiders?
Why is it that because a person can't walk, that people just love to stare?
Or because a person isn't talking?
Sometimes I just want to yell..."WHAT THE F IS YOUR PROBLEM MAN? IS HE SUCH A FRICKIN' ANOMALY THAT YOU CAN'T TEAR YOUR EYES AWAY FROM HIM?"